5 challenging toddler behaviours – and why they’re actually a good thing
By Livia Gamble
You love your toddler to the moon and back, but let’s face it – some of their behaviours can be pretty frustrating. It’s like they’re hard-wired to know precisely how to push your buttons.
We have good news, because those behaviours (you know, the tantrums and boundary pushing) actually serve an essential purpose. So the next time you feel like you’re at your wit’s end, remember the silver lining: these annoying behaviours are working their magic, developmentally.
Here are 5 ways toddlers push your buttons, and why it’s a good thing.
1. They’re messy!
It’s true, toddlers can be very messy – but it’s actually good for them. Messy play is great for development, especially fine and gross motor skills. Children can learn about their environment, take risks and be encouraged to express themselves. This applies to food too.
Playing with food helps children develop their senses and become independent and adventurous eaters. If the mess bothers you, pop down a plastic mat under their high chair, or take the meal outside. Read more fun food games to play with your toddler.
2. Wanting to read the same book over and over again
Committing every word from Pig the Pug to memory has few pros for parents, but reading the same story over and over has lots of benefits for children. In fact, an article published in The Conversation says repetition helps kids learn.
“Repeated readings of the same storybook helps children learn novel words, particularly for children aged three to five years,” they write. “You might not think storybooks are complicated, but they contain 50% more rare words than prime-time television and even college students’ conversations. When was the last time you used the word giraffe in a conversation with a colleague? Learning all this information takes time.”
Also, young children prefer to read stories that are familiar to them over new ones. “A preference for familiarity, rather than novelty, is commonly reported at young ages, and reflects an early stage in the learning process,” says the article.
3. Answering every single question with “no”
This is probably one of the more annoying behaviours that parents have to deal with. Toddlers saying “no” to even the most mundane of requests can make things pretty tricky – but it’s for an excellent reason, so hang in there!
During this phase, toddlers’ brains are developing at a rapid rate. Your child realises they are their own person (and not an extension of you); they have their own opinions and are learning to express them. On the other hand, they are 100% testing you to see how far they can push you with this delightful new word … it’s just how they learn.
4. Throwing temper tantrums
It’s really important for parents to remember that tantrums are a very normal part of development. Toddlers are still learning about their feelings and emotions – what they are and how to deal with them. While your child’s language skills are still developing, it can be challenging for them to communicate with you, causing a tantrum or two.
Raising Children says, “Tantrums are one of the ways that young children express and manage feelings, and try to understand or change what’s going on around them.”
So the next time your child has a meltdown, wait until they’re calm and try to turn it into a learning experience for what they can do next time.
5. The non-stop babble
Your toddler starting to talk is an exhilarating life stage, but parents who are blessed with a Chatty Cathy might be wondering whyyy this has happened to them.
There are a few reasons why children can become babblers. Firstly, they’re learning new words every day, so of course they want to put their new found vocab into action. Toddlers also want you to chat back to them – not only does this teach them new words, but also the art of conversation.
So while all of these behaviours might be testing your patience, they’re all a very normal part of your toddler’s development.
Good luck (and maybe buy some earplugs)!
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