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Finding The Right Daycare by Felicity Frankish.
As a first-time mum I didn’t need anyone to tell me how hard it was going to be to leave Cassie in daycare while I went back to work. I knew I wanted to go back to work. I needed it. I’d enjoyed six months at home with Cassie and it was time to dip my toes into the working water again. I was starting off slowly, with just two days of work per week, and my mum had offered to look after Cassie on one of them. That meant I just needed to find someone I trusted to mind Cassie for one day each week. Easy right?
Turns out my daycare journey was not to be a simple one. Cassie is now 22 months old and currently moving onto her fourth childcare.
I would like to think the problem wasn’t us – and trust me, I’ve had my doubts along the way. But when it all comes down to it, I just keep telling myself – she is my most precious possession, if the place doesn’t feel right, I should keep looking. And so I did.
I knew I wanted family daycare for Cassie when she started at six months. I wanted her to have that more personalised care in a smaller setting – where she was less likely to get sick or have to fight for attention over eight other screaming babies.
I shopped around and nothing seemed right. I felt a vibe the moment I walked through the door. I wasn’t concerned about their qualifications, whether they provided nappies and meals or how long they had been doing it for – that would all come second. What I cared about, was how they interacted with Cassie.
We finally walked into one home where I felt that connection. This woman was lovely and pampered my baby girl. She was looking after toddlers and loved the baby age. I knew Cassie would be in good hands.
And she was. For a month or two. Unfortunately, our daycare lady had forgotten what those baby years entailed and wasn’t prepared for it. The moment my easy, breezy gorgeous daughter was called “high maintenance”, I handed in our notice and got out of there.
Cassie was still only eight months old at this stage, so family daycare was still my main agenda. I had a better idea of what I was looking for this time around. I felt experienced. When I came across two gorgeous centres in the one home, I felt at ease. It was family daycare, but the carers also had each other. I loved it. Turns out, so did Cassie.
Cassie flourished the four months she was there. Her teacher adored her, and we adored her teacher right back. Going to work was so much easier. I got photo updates of Cassie each day and picked her up with a smile on her face. I couldn’t have asked for anything more. Then they closed down. Seriously, seriously bad luck on our part.
By now I was feeling like a family daycare failure. Cassie was now 12 months, so I switched to childcare. I honestly didn’t think I could find a family daycare better than the one we had, and trust me, I had searched the area long and hard since we started out. On the recommendation of friends, I put Cassie into a new childcare centre that had just reopened after being refurbished. One tour and I was convinced. This place looked great!
Our first year there was bliss. Then my loving little girl turned into a bit of a hitter, which only got worse when she moved up rooms. I had overlooked one MASSIVE thing when picking this daycare: I didn’t ask about their values. When it came to discipline, we just weren’t on the same page.
It made me realise how much I had overlooked in the process. The centre looked great, and that’s all I had cared about. The old me cared about the people who would be looking after my daughter. I think the new me was jaded from my past daycare experiences and feeling downtrodden. So I overlooked it, thinking if it looked fantastic, it must be. But there is so much more to a centre and I learned that the hard way.
We have just started our fourth centre and Cassie is loving it. This time, I went on the lookout for everything: the centre’s values, their teachers, their directors, their families. I wanted to know it all and I asked every question possible. I took Cassie back for a second visit before she started to watch her play and interact with the other kids.
It has been a long road for us so far, and who knows if it is over yet. I like to think we have found the perfect place, otherwise I wouldn’t be sending my daughter there. I have learned so much along the way, but most importantly, I have learned I shouldn’t have to settle when it comes to the care for my child. By asking the right questions and really getting to know a place, I feel confident I can find one that will work. The last thing I need as a working mum is to be feeling more guilt.
What was important to you when finding the right daycare?
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