Your child not listening to you? This could be why
How often do you feel the frustration of your child not listening to a word you say? It can definitely drive you crazy. But there could be a way to avoid it.
TikTok dad coach, Devonte Bennett Bey, recently posted a video on Instagram, demonstrating a more effective way to communicate with our children. And it looks like he’s not the only one in the public eye who likes to practice this technique.
Get on down
We often forget how much bigger we are and how terrifying it might be for a little one to be talked over by a towering adult. It’s no wonder they’re not always happy to listen to what we have to say. According to Devonte, it’s all about the way you use your power. And by getting down on your child’s level will help to achieve a more positive outcome.
On his Instagram post, the video shows him standing over and talking to his perplexed-looking child with a caption detailing what’s going on. “When I stand over him, I can show him that I am powerful because I am bigger and stronger and more intimidating,” reads the caption.
Devonte then gets down on his son’s level, which even to the outside eye looks more understanding and empathetic. The narration continues, “But when I come down to his level… I can show him that I am powerful because of my ability to communicate, show empathy ad respect.”
Hot parenting tip
The video attracted over 2000 likes and struck a chord with many parents. Comments like, “Complete truth!!!! Thank you for sharing!”, “This is amazing… thank you so much!” and also “I absolutely love this,” show that Devonte’s message was appreciated. One honest follower offered another light-hearted perspective with the remark, “My only struggle is when I get down on their level, my knees struggle to help me get back up to my level again.” While this is also true (for me as well), it makes sense to talk to your child eye to eye. And this simple approach, so different from previous generations, is fast becoming a favoured technique around the world.
The Princess approach
Royal mum Kate Middleton has long been admired for her warm and modern approach to parenting, unlike that of royals in days gone by. Mother to Prince George, 6, Princess Charlotte, 4, and Prince Louis, 1, Kate has often been seen out in public, crouching down to talk to her children, on their level.
In an interview with express.co.uk, parenting expert Martina Mercer offered some insights into Kate’s not-so royal techniques. “Kate’s parenting style can easily be described as modern,” commented Martina. “Alongside her own values, she’s obviously researched the best ways to bring up children in today’s society.”
According to Martina, Kate understands the many benefits of not standing over her children to talk to them. “It removes the fear of the parent while utilising eye contact and connecting with the child on their level,” she reported. “It enhances communication, understanding and ultimately demonstrates love.”
A modern royal parent
While this is not the way parenting was done by previous parents in the Royal Family, the next generation is clearly evolving with the times. “When Charles was a boy it would have been completely out of character for the Queen to crouch down to talk to him or for her to show any type of affection in public,” commented Martina. “The Duchess, on the other hand, is not afraid to show affection when out with her children.”
So even with the eyes of the world on her, Kate is determined to parent as she wants to. After all, parenting techniques change and develop over time, and at the end of the day, she’s just is a mum who wants to do what’s right for her and her kids, not what is expected.
“Ultimately there’s love, care and affection in the way Kate is raising her children,” Martina explained. “She’s a mother we can all relate to as she simply wants to bring up children who are respectful, well mannered, but above all, happy and loved.”
